I remember one late summer night, five years ago. It was late...I'd just woken up from a terrible dream. The worst dream I have ever had in my life. By the grace of God, the details have left me. But that night, I woke up.
I was fighting a battle. One that had gone over a lifetime, but had centralized and strengthened in the past three months.
The battle of my heart.
All summer I had struggled.
Struggled with knowing and understanding who God was. What salvation was. Why He loved me. Why He wanted to save me. What it all meant.
I had spent the whole summer wondering if I was really saved.
I went to camp for the first time. I was deeply convicted.
But I still had not taken that final step.
But that night, the night of my terrible nightmare....
I knew what I had to do.
I ran downstairs...it was late.
Miraculously, my parents were still awake.
I ran to them and told them.
"I'm not saved. I need to be saved."
My mom led me through the Romans Road, showing me the plan of salvation.
And there, on my living room floor, on July 31 at 11:00 at night I knelt.
I put my full faith and trust in Jesus Christ.
I sit here today, typing this as a fully redeemed child of God.
Five years is a long time, but it's also so short.
That first year was amazing. I did ten times better in church and in life than I ever had before.
But after that first year...I began to feel stunted.
I struggled with continuing to grow.
This year, I feel like the stunts have been pulled out of me. I have grown so much.
Sometimes, I feel physically weary from the overwhelmingness of it all.
But it's a good weary.
I could not have done the last five years without my Rescuer, my Savior, my Lord, my King, Jesus Christ.
God has been with me in the best of times and the worst of times--even when I did not put my all into Him.
He's protected me from harm.
He's rejoiced when I have rejoiced.
He has held me close and cried as I cried.
God is truly the best friend I could ever have. He will never leave me nor forsake me. I will always be His. He has plans for me in my life that I can't even imagine.
Life is hard. I've already seen that too many times to count.
But in the end, everything's going to be okay. Every time I am tried by fire I will strive to come out as gold.
And with the grace of God and the strength He gives me...